Rachel Bloom
Sexy

Biography

The beautiful Rachel Bloom is the perfect trifecta of Hollywood talent: a gifted writer, a transcendent actress, and an uproarious comedian. Also, her boobs are huge. This buxom brunette went to NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts, snagging a BFA in drama while head writing for the school’s most elite comedy troupe. After continuing her comedic studies at the renowned Upright Citizens Brigade Theater, Rachel eventually moved back to SoCal, where she kept writing and producing, eventually churning out the viral music video “Fuck me, Ray Bradbury” in 2010. While we couldn’t stop laughing at the absurd lyrics, our thermostat turned up to 451 watching Rachel play the busty, pigtailed schoolgirl with a fetish for the “greatest sci-fi writer in history.” All Summer in a Day? More like all puberty in three minutes! While men everywhere mixed working on that robot novel with choking the chicken at the thought of someone like Rachel getting turned on by it, she was the one who found huge success with her writing, penning scripts for Robot Chicken and the Jonah Hill animated comedy Allen Gregory. But Rachel’s career really took off when she created and starred in the quirky CW musical comedy Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. A hilarious show about Rebecca Bunch, a millennial woman who follows her ex-boyfriend to California, it’s crazy to think someone let a gal like this get away after seeing her in her underwear a whole bunch over the course of the show’s four seasons. During the aptly named “Sexy Getting Ready Song” we see her doing her sensual best to look good; getting fresh in a bathtub while her boyfriend lazily naps before the big date. Rachel kisses another girl during a hot club scene, shows good downblouse in a skintight tiger outfit while singing about STD testing, and presses her sing song sin bins against a window to get an office worker’s attention. When that show wrapped in 2019, Bloom showed up in episodes of iZombie, Portlandia and Drunk History, while doing mainly voice work on the big screen in flicks like Trolls World Tour (2020). We just wish Rachel would show us her body in full Bloom!